How to Make it in College: 4 Tips for College Freshmen

1.  Do the first two weeks like your life depends on it.  

What you do the first two to three weeks often sets the pattern for your whole college career. Get into a regular pattern and schedule of classes, study, rest and fun.  Balance is important.

2.  Choose friends by your priorities....not your priorities by your new friends.   

Decide what is important to you (faith, grades, etc) then choose and make friends with those who share those priorities.  You are more likely to make good grades, etc, if you hang out with people who also want to make good grades.

3.  Emotionally go to college.

Many freshmen do not have a good experience because they are not there emotionally.  There  is more to college than just taking classes.  Decide to be a part of it.  Students who are active on campus tend to be happier and make better grades.  High school may have been great, but let go and do college now.

4.  Become part of a group.

Everybody needs a posse.  If you are a Christian, find and connect to a Christian group like the Baptist Collegiate Ministry.  You will find friends that care and adult mentors who can help  you navigate this new time in your life. 

For more tips on making it in college, check out Arliss Dickerson's book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9.

The Secret to Doubling Your Collegiate Ministry - Part 2

 Freshmen are selfish in that they are in survival mode.  They are looking for fun, friends and anything or anybody that will help them navigate this new world of college life.

What do Freshmen NEED and What are they looking for?

    1.  Friends - They will either find their friends and the friends will take them to fun or vice versa.

    2.  Fun - If they find fun first, they usually will make their friends there.

    3.  Survival helps - Who has good and reliable information.  Where are my classes?  What do I do when a professor is a jerk?  How do I get along with a roommate who keeps the lights on all night and has the TV on super loud?

    4.  Community - Nearly all freshmen want and need a support group....not feeling alone in this new world is a huge concern for them.

    5.  Mentors - Are there any older, more experienced people who can help me?

    6.  Dealing with Questions and Doubts about faith - Why should I believe what I have always believed when my professor thinks it is silly and my next door neighbor is a Buddhist who is cool.

What are some Freshmen Ministry Options?

    1.  Fun and attractive start of school events.  Christian campus and church college ministries should NEVER let other campus groups out fun and out excellence them with fun Welcome Events. Church ministries MUST make the most of the first three Sundays  

    2.  Freshmen Family Groups.  I prefer the term "Family Group" over "Bible Study Group" because it is less intimidating to that freshmen who thinks, "I don't know anything about the Bible and would be embarrassed by my inability to find those weird Old Testament Books."  Plus, Freshmen Family Groups can be a great mix of Survival Tips AND Bible study.

    3. Freshmen Nights - These can be a whole fall semester or just the first 3 or 4 weeks.  They can be a mix of fun, encouragement and Bible study.  Churches can do a Freshmen Focus type program before the weeknight event.   

    4.  Freshmen Survival - An extended Freshmen event that can range from 3 or 4 hours to an all day or even weekend event.  It is filled with community, fun, and survival tips.

    

Remember the College Ministry Adage:  Spend wisely, extravagantly the first two weeks of the fall semester.

Arliss Dickerson's book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, is available at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9 and A 3 Part College Ministry Success Formula is at Amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV.

The Secret to Doubling Your Collegiate Ministry - Part 1

 Some years ago I wrote a piece that made the audacious claim that a specialized, well done Freshmen Ministry could double the size of your ministry......and now some years later, I stick by that claim!

WHY? 

1.  If you are about helping those in need, freshmen are those students.

2.  Freshmen are the most reachable of all students.  Their schedules are not set yet and they are looking for fun and friends.

 Ten Truths of Freshmen Ministry

1.  Freshmen are more available to you the first two to three weeks of the fall than at any other point in their college career.

2.  Freshmen must be met where they are emotionally and spiritually and loved while challenged to accept Christ or grow in that relationship.

3.  College freshmen are easier to reach than any other group and easier to lose than any other group.

4.  Freshmen respond initially to large well done events, but are retained to a ministry by the individual and personal.

5.  An aggressive outreach to Freshmen will be surprising in who responds and frustrating in those who do not remain.

6.  Relationships usually determine where freshmen go and do not go.

7.  Most decisions are made by freshmen in regard to how it will benefit or affect them.

8.  Who the leaders are in your freshmen ministry will help determine who responds to your ministry.

9.  Freshmen will either become like what they see modelled for them in a ministry or turn away from what they see.

10. Freshmen respond best to that which offers them help in specific, practical skills, and personal care.

NEXT:  The Secret to Doubling Your Collegiate Ministry - Part 2, What do Freshmen Need and What appeals to them?

Arliss Dickerson's book, Reaching MORE College Students is at Amazon.com/dp/B0BMW8NPMN and A 3 Part College Ministry Success Formula is at Amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV.

15 Wise Sayings in College Ministry

1.  Good falls are made in the summer.

2.  To reach a particular campus group, reach someone in that group.  

3.  It takes three years to establish a college ministry or for it to become yours.  

4.  Who you reach determines who you cannot reach.  

5.  Once a student has been inside your facility or meeting space, they are more likely to come back.  

6.  A college ministry will almost always reflect the strengths and weaknesses of the leader and this is particularly true, the longer that leader has served in that role.  

7.  The UNFORGIVEABLE SIN of college ministry is not getting a student's name and contact information the first time they attend your event.  

8.  A meeting space will fill to only about 80% capacity on a regular basis and a meeting space with too many seats is a negative.

9. The quality of your publicity is a message about the quality of your ministry.

10. Pictures made at ministry events answer questions potential students do not even know to ask.

11. Money will not make a ministry, but it is hard to have much ministry without some money.

12. You cannot expect students to do something you are not willing to do or demonstrating in your own life.

13.  The person most likely to give money to your ministry is someone who has already given money to your ministry.

14.  What your ministry does the first two weeks of the fall will shape your ministry for the whole year.

15.  God is always doing more than we know.  Live and act on that belief  

Arliss Dickerson's book, A 3 Part College Ministry Success Formula, is available at Amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV and Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades is at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9.

Why Do College Freshmen Drop Out of Church?

 Most college freshmen make no spiritual connection at college.

For many it is not that they suddenly dropped church, they had really checked out about the 10th grade.  But, for those who were involved in church through high school graduation, what happened?  I do not think it is an intentional decision to quit church.  There are several factors that are a part of it all.

High school seniors feel like they have graduated from church.

Youth ministries more and more have become separated from the church as a whole.  Wednesday night youth service is usually larger than youth Sunday attendance.  When they leave the youth group, their church is gone.

College is busier.

College just has more going on and more new things to adapt to and students do not take the intentional steps to make sure it is a priority and their schedule just fills up and church is not part of it.  Students go to college looking for two things:  fun and friends.  The fun and friends they find usually determine the rest of where they go.

Parents okay dropping out.

I always feel guilty when I say that.  Here is what I mean.  Lots of godly, committed Christian parents were not active in their faith in college and then came back to church and they assume their son or daughter will do the same.  But, it is not working that way in recent years.  Just as parents talk about studying, keeping scholarships, etc, parents must talk about faith expectations and raise that issue just as they do talk about grades and classes.

Freshmen mess up!

When students go looking for fun, it is easy to find fun that leads to trouble.  It is not unusual for students to participate in things they never did in high school.  This "mess up" on their part leads to guilt feelings and Christian activities are just a reminder of the guilt or sense of failure they are feeling.

Freshmen go where their friends go.

It is simple, if none of their new friends go to church, why would they?  Going to a new and strange church is hard.  Going to a new and strange church by yourself is even harder. Making some Christian friend connections in the beginning is a huge factor!

College churches are often much larger.

The majority of churches are less than one hundred people.  Most college churches that reach out to students are much larger.  Even when some freshmen go once, they don't return out of a feeling of not belonging or how different it was than their home church.

Freshmen are exposed to a variety of ideas, questions and even to those who are critical of faith.

One of the things that happens at college is students are exposed to different beliefs, religions and skepticism about Christian faith.  While some professors will be openly Christians in their expressions, an another may be openly critical of Christian faith.  The student sitting next to them may be a Buddhist or a Witch in beliefs.  Who knew all those different ideas were out there?

Freshmen often just feel overwhelmed.

It is not unusual for freshmen to say they are just scared.  It is not just one thing.....it is the bigness and and change of it all.  Consequently, they just pull back and try to simplify their life as much as possible.

A few suggestions:

Help students to understand the importance of being intentional about making faith connections during those first couple of weeks of school.  Those friends and connections will bless them for the rest of their college career.

Make sure that the Baptist Collegiate Ministry or another ministry or college church has their name and contact information prior to school starting.

When parents go to visit for Parents Weekend or Homecoming, let them know in advance all of you will be attending church together, wherever they say.

Arliss Dickerson's book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, is available at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9 and A 3 Part College Ministry Success Formula is at Amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV.

10 Things Parents of a College Freshman Need to Know

 1.  Psychologists say the two greatest times of change in a person's life are birth to age one and high school graduation to Christmas.  Obviously, that is right where you student is.  That is why it is so important to stay connected and involved during this time, but letting them to make and learn to make their own decisions.  It is a balancing act.

2.  College is usually harder than high school for most students and their grades may not be as good as in high school.  They may be studying just as hard or harder, yet their grades are not quite as good.

3.  The friends and habits a student develops during the first 2-3 weeks often determine their whole college career.  Make sure they understand the importance of starting with a clear set of priorities and realize the importance of the start.  

4.  Recent studies say 6 out of 10 students who were active in church as a high school senior, make NO spiritual connections in college.  If faith is a priority in your family, discuss the importance of and how to make it a part of the first three weeks.  Most students do not make an intentional decision to walk away from faith.  It just is not an intentional choice at the beginning.

5.  Parents cannot see their son or daughter's grades without a signed form that can be obtained from the registrar's office.  This is part of privacy laws.  It does not matter that you are paying the bill.

6.  Students who live in dorms on campus tend to make better grades.   It is all about being connected to college life and feeling like a college student.  Students who commute from home should not have to live on the family schedule, but be encouraged to be a part of campus life.  Some buy a meal ticket or balance card that can be used for meals on campus.

7.  National studies show that students who are active in campus organizations are more likely to be happy, stay in school and graduate.  Again, it is all about being connected and feeling a part.  Obviously, students can do too much that distracts from studies, but involvement is a healthy plus!

8.  A recent study shows that students tend to marry someone they date!  Really.

9.  You should know where your student lives at school and how they can be contacted other than by cell phone.  It is wise to know their dorm and room number, apartment number, etc.  How can someone else contact them, if need be?

10.  The average is for students to change their major 2 to 3 times.  It is wise to take basics at the beginning before jumping into major classes, if possible.  This allows time for adjustment and further determination of a major.

Some Suggestions:

Make sure your student understands, if they plan to drop a class, it is important to officially drop it...not just stop going.  Also, if a student drops a class and this drops them below 12 hours, they may not be considered a full time student which can affect scholarships and even car insurance.

If joining a fraternity or sorority is an option, consider the possibility of delaying that until after the first semester.  This allows time to adjust to all the new and to have a clear sense of what a group is really like.

If you expect and talk to your student about good grades and study habits, why not talk about good faith practices and ask about those as well.

A big help is to make sure the Baptist Collegiate Ministry, some other ministry and/or a local church has the name and contact information of your student prior to school starting. That helps connect them to some good relationships in the beginning.  College Ministers can be a great friend during this adjustment and key period.

Want more help for your freshman?  Arliss' book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, is available at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9.

Understanding and Dealing with Criticism

If you are in any sort of public or leadership role, criticism goes with it.  It is one of the free extra benefits.  Often, the more successful you are, the more criticism you will receive.

First, AVOID the two Extremes!  One extreme is to take it all to heart and let it paralyze you or keep you from doing anything.  It can destroy your sense of calling, purpose and even personal value.  The other extreme is totally ignoring all of it.  There is a healthy and beneficial middle.

1.  Consider the source.  When someone who believes in you, loves you and works with you, gives what seems a negative word, their criticisms are likely NOT criticism, but healthy, helpful and beneficial feedback.  AND, there are some people that just need to be ignored....AND, their criticism may even really be a compliment. Don't confuse feedback with criticism.

2.  You need to HEAR it.  If it is from a reliable source or at least not from one you know is a Negative Nancy, then hear it.  You probably are not perfect, so there may be something there that needs to be learned.  Not all criticism is automatically unfair or wrong.  Valid criticism can be helpful when you get past the sting.  

3.  You need to NOT dwell on it.  Listen, evaluate and then decide where to go from there.  If it is valid, make some adjustments, if not, don't waste energy on it.

4.  Realize some criticism comes as a result of a lack of communication on our part.  Is everybody getting the information they need and do they know WHY certain actions are being taken?

5.  Some criticism is about lack of balance.  In college ministry, a College Minister has more jobs than he or she can get done.  There are more areas that are important and getting the right balance is tough.  Sometimes, the criticism is reminding us of a neglected area and the continuing struggle for balance.

Remember, criticism often communicates that people care.  When nobody cares, there is NO Criticism.  Is there some way they might be of benefit in this area, if there needs to be some adjustment?

BIG REMINDER:  Anonymous letters have little to no value!  Someone wrote my pastor and friend a nasty letter and put my name and return address on it.  Someone asked him how he knew it was not from me.  He said, "If Arliss has something to say, he will get in my face and say it. Second, I figure he knows how to spell his name correctly."  

Anonymous letters are meant to hurt NOT help!

Arliss Dickerson's book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, is available at amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9 and A College Ministry Success Formula is at amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV.

Good Falls Are Made in the Summer!

I love summer and have since I was a little kid.  One of the key Axioms of College Ministry is "Good Falls Are Made in the Summer".  I was reminded of that saying this week by a College Minister friend.  If that is true, WHY is it true?  And, I do believe that it is true.

1.  There is time for clear headed evaluation and thinking.  For most College Ministers, the school year is so busy and dealing with one issue from another, that it is hard to see the forest for the trees.  Summer is the best time to evaluate and ask questions like, "What is not worth the time and effort I or we put into it?" Is there a change that needs to be made?

2.  There is time to study and develop speaking outlines for the main events, if you are the speaker.  I am a big believer in laying out your topic, scripture and simple outline for every week of the fall.  That relieves lots of weekly stress.  And, you can always change, if need be.

3.  Incoming Freshmen Contacts are made and Freshmen Orientation events are attended.  Contacts may be at large events or through area churches that have students coming to your campus.  Social media is huge with this generation.  Are you using it in the fullest to reach out to students coming to your campus?  What about posting a "Freshmen Tips of the Week" on social media?  What about having a "Coke or Coffee Time" in some area communities for students coming your way? 

4.  Potential student leaders can be contacted, enlisted, and encouraged.  Our ministry is always only as strong as our student leaders.  Are there incoming freshmen students you have been made aware of that indicate the potential for being a leader?  Invite them to be on your Freshmen Leadership Team for when school starts.  Enlist them now.

5.  Meeting places can be spruced up.  If you have a campus Center or Campus House or a specific meeting room at the church, how does it look?  Does it need new paint?  Does it need re-organizing?  Could there be a new "Feature Wall"?  What about making some "Posters" out of some great pictures from last year and hanging them?  If you have some sort of building, how does the yard, shrubs, etc look?  By the way, painting and yard work can be a great place for volunteers.

6. Invest some extra time in marriage and family!!!  That is good for you and good for them.  Go on walks in the evening with your spouse, kids, or friends, if you are a single.  Many singles have friends that are family to them.  

7.  Communicate gratitude to supporters.  It can be taking some key people to lunch and just saying thanks for encouraging me this year.  For some, it is thanks for your financial support.  Or, thanks for bringing that meal.  Who needs to hear of your gratitude?

8.  Send an Alumni Update.  One of MY sayings is, "A College Minister ought to be fired if they are not doing something with alumni."  It can be a great newsletter with news of alums or it can just be a letter letting them know what is happening.  I also say, "Never send out an alumni newsletter without a return envelope in it."  Don't beg for money, but let them know it matters and again, you are GRATEFUL.

9.  Make some intentional effort to learn more about college ministry from somebody who knows more than you.  Maybe, you know a lot.  But, maybe someone's large group event is particularly successful.  Or, maybe someone else really has it going on in one to one discipleship.  Make an appointment.  Go see them.  Take them to lunch.  Ask to follow them around and ask questions.  If they have a Center, House or meeting place, see what it looks like.  Sometimes, it is the little stuff that make a difference.

10.  Communicate appreciation to your student leaders for their time and investment.....not just, "Here are all the things I need you to do this fall."

11.  Think of one thing you might do new or different that would touch a few new students.  If you are desperate for ideas, look here,  Amazon.com/dp/B0BMW8NPMN.

Arliss Dickerson's book, Tips for College Freshmen:  124 Tips for Fun, Faith & Good Grades, is available at Amazon.com/dp/B09QFB9DJ9 and A 3 Part College Ministry Success Formula is at Amazon.com/dp/B0BZ6Q7HSV.