How Much Time Should You Give One Student?

In my recent blog article, "What Causes 'The Lid' on Your College Ministry?" I did not mention one possible lid.  It is possible to let too few students take up the majority of your time.  There is a conundrum here in that we want to invest in students individually and we want to be available for those that need us.

We need to do one to one discipleship and we must do crisis or developmental "counseling".  But, here is the thing.....there are a few students who will take four or five hours a day, if we will let them.  Or, one of the things I warn young College Ministers about is, letting your office become the lounge area.  Got some time to kill?  Go hang out in the College Minister's office.  He or She does not have anything better to do.

I have a graduate degree in Guidance Counseling and one of the most valuable things I learned is, students who need to talk will often take ever how much time that you give them.  If you give them an hour, it will take an hour.  But, my great Guidance Counselor Professor shared this, when a student says, "Can I talk to you?" and it is not something that has been planned or scheduled, you must control the situation.  This is that student that is famous for hour long conversations when you do not have an hour.  When they ask you say, "Sure, I have about ten minutes."  Almost always, that will be enough time.

On the other end of the spectrum, it is possible to invest too much time in the super sharp leader types.  I am not backing up on my belief that we must be investing in leaders and that developing them will grow our ministry, as well as develop leaders for the future church. But, it is also possible to just be talking to those students we enjoy talking to or are "our favorites".  All of us have students we relate to more naturally and just enjoy.  But, if we succumb to that temptation, it will mean we will not have the time to connect to other students out on campus or to be doing something else only we can do.  

There is a fine line in students feeling we are accessible and not letting our office become a "lounge area".  Some years ago, I went to see another Campus Minister on campus.  The secretary said he was back in his office.  I walked into his office to see one student sitting behind the College Minister's desk doing home work.  Another was sitting in front of the desk playing a guitar and there was a couple in the corner....well, they were obviously on a very romantic date.  The College Minister was in the other corner doing some paper work.  That is when your office has become the lounge.  Sometimes, you just have to say, "Hey folks, I got some stuff I have to do, can we move this to another area, please."

Give students time, but be wise in when and how much time you give to individual students.

Should your college ministry be reaching more students?  Check out, Reaching MORE College Students:  Next Level College Ministry, at amazon.com/dp/B0BMW8NPMN.